Gay Life: The Paulinator – A New Season of Paulination
Welcome back fellow bees to another season of The Paulinator’s guide to gay life and the city. This time around I’ll be focusing on hot spots that are perfect for romantic rendezvouses and giving you a little insight on how this bee is paulinating throughout the city, looking for love.
When last we met, The Paulinator was traveling far and wide to seek the attention of an Argentinian out on Long Island. Needless to say, the commute, his green card marriage and his no alcohol policy were three strikes against him. While the thought of an exotic boyfriend danced around in my mind, I needed to be realistic and go with my gut on this one. Was I heart broken? No, not so much, but I was sad that I was back to square one, that is until I decided to step up my game and make it my mission to seriously start dating more.
I’ve never had success on online dating Web sites like OkCupid or Match.com… please don’t even get my started on E-Harmony’s policies regarding same-sex couples. What I have found very interesting is that I have been really oddly successful in finding dates via the micro-blogging Web site Twitter. Who would have thought that in 140 characters you could potentially find your soul mate, or at the very least your TwitterCrush. In order to find that special someone though you might have to still go through those awkward first dates you just wish you could forget. For example, this guy’s avatar made him appear relatively good looking. We had sent tweets back and forth in a flirty fashion and the surprisingly one night, he sends me a Direct Message asking if I wanted to grab brunch with him… quite possibly the gayest of all the meals. I agreed and he picked the time and place.
We’re both Astorians so thought it would be great to grab a quick coffee and take the train into the city together. (I thought it was odd he didn’t pick a place in Astoria.) So I arrived at the designated Starbucks and grabbed a coffee. I would have waited for him, but I received a text message while I was already on my way that he was running behind schedule. So, I sipped my coffee as I waited, and waited and waited. Strike 1! He arrived and I was a bit horrified that he was not as well groomed as I would have preferred. First off, I am not vain and my fashion style leaves something to be desired, but I at least know one is suppose to have 2 eyebrows and trim outlandish nose hairs.Strike 1.5!
The train ride was fine, we talked jobs, friends, fun activities, the usual first date chatter. When we arrived at 44 & 1/2 a cute restaurant on 10th Avenue with some of the hottest wait-staff around the city, we sat near the front door and continued our conversation from the subway. When we approached the topic of family and siblings, I thought it was an odd time to bring out the fact that his father has been married 6 times and that his mother had 4 miscarriages. Now, both are normal, one can assume, but when he factors each of the miscarriages as a sibling, I started to get weirded out. Strike 2!
During our meal, the straw that broke the camel’s back was presented to me. I remember this guy tweeting about recovering from some cold, and I noticed that he still had a bit of the sniffles while we ate. Unfortunately for him and his long nose hairs, there were some unflattering remnants clinging for dear life. On a first date, or in casual conversation with a friend, I believe it is appropriate to tell someone they may need to wipe their nose. So I did, and he did his best to clean it out, only making it worse. Thinking he had solved the problem, I informed him he hadn’t. Sadly, this went on five or six more times. I’m not sure why he didn’t excuse himself from the table to use the restroom, but because of this, I had to give him strike 3!
Now you might be thinking that I would give up on Twitter dates, but as you’ll see, I’m not one to give up so quickly. Coming up in future columns, we’ve got LA-Tweeter and Dr.TwitterCrush, plus the return of my Latin Lover and his friends & a whole lot more, so stay tuned!
Tags:44 1/2, First Dates, Green Card Marriage, Hell's Kitchen, The Paulinator, Twitter
Leave a comment